Thoroughly discouraged by my failure to convert the office bad boy into my life partner, I looked for any reason to distract myself from having to see A. every day. For once, the opportunity presented itself quite easily, without the usual chase I was used to. Enter JL. My place of work is in a large commercial area with a neighborhood pub just across the street. Our little street of shops consists of bodegas, souvenir stands, corner markets and restaurants. Even though I work in a fairly tourist based industry, you slowly start to recognize people who work around you.
One cold Tuesday morning, I was sitting at my desk when a scruffy looking guy walked in. I recognized his t-shirt as having the name of the restaurant nearby. He walked up to my director to ask about the price of a piece hanging in the window. She told him, and then he pointed at me and said "And who is this?" My good-natured director laughed at him and told him my name and said that I could help him with any further questions he had. He left the store and came back with a chocolate that he gingerly placed on my desk. I looked at him questioningly. He said he like the painting of the baseball player, and wished he could afford it for himself, and walked away.
My good-natured (much-older and female) director DM ran up to my desk squealing with delight that he was "flirting" with me. I said "That was flirting?". It all happened so fast, I had never seen this man before even though he apparently worked next door. DM quickly concocted a scheme for me to flirt back. We have small, postcard reproductions of pieces, and DM suggested I take one to him of his favorite Yankee. It was almost quitting time by now, so I sauntered my self over to his bar. When I presented him with the picture, he walked all the way around the bar, planted a huge kiss on my cheek, and gave me a great big bear hug. His reaction was a bit surprising and threw me a bit off balance. He immediately started making me a drink and asked me what I wanted to eat. While I waited for my food, I sipped my martini and he regaled me with stories of New York, and his adventures as a bartender in California. As I signed my check he asked if he could take me out, I said yes and gave him my number. He texted me later that night asking me if I was ok "dating" a 38-year-old bartender. Woah woah woah buddy "date?", we haven't even gone out once yet! That should have been my first clue.
He called me the very next day and invited me out for a pub crawl with his other bartender friends. I was to meet him at his bar at 6:00 pm for a small bite. For some reason, I was more nervous to meet him than I was to meet A. CE kindly reminded me that I know this guy likes me, so I have nothing to worry about! Easier said than done, this guy was ten years older than me, and I had never dated anyone who was even a few years older than me.
I had a really fun night. He bought all my drinks, and we went all around the city to all these fun bars I had never even heard of! This guy is apparently well-known ;), as most bartenders would be I guess. We couldn't walk down the street without him stopping to say hi to every other person we passed. We had a very nice goodnight kiss and I made my way home.
The next day I had to work until 10pm, and he called me around 9 asking me to meet him at a bar uptown. Two days in a row? Sure! I ran home, changed, and grabbed a cab to go meet him. Things got pretty heavy with us that night and I ended up inviting him back to my apartment...oops. It.was.AWFUL. He had no moves, was awkward and bumpy, and did not satisfy me one (little) bit. And then he snored so loudly I couldn't even sleep. The next morning was even worse! He slept until 2:30pm, asked ME to keep it down, and wouldn't leave! I had to make-up some excuse as to why I had to leave, in order to get him to leave. Like ew.
The following week he texted and called me incessantly. Normally I would like this because I'm down with instant gratification, but for some reason it really turned me off. He even came into my place of business and hung around looking for me. Then I got this dreaded text, "I feel like you're avoiding me". Buddy! It's been less than a week, like chill out, you're 38. I was so turned off that I began to do the slow fade. I was overwhelmed by his eagerness, and I wasn't even sure if a 38-year-old bartender was for me. He finally stopped reaching out to me, which for some reason flipped a switch in my head that said "Hey, where'd you go?" It's a funny thing, always wanting what you can't have.
I wouldn't see him for several weeks until I dragged my crew out to his bar one night when I was bored and wanted some attention. More on that night later, but look for a post labeled "I'm Angry!"
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